Those of us coping with mental health issues whether personally or as a caretaker know how isolating the experience can be. Being alone with our concerns can be important but it can also be helpful to feel love and concern from others. If someone in our neighborhood has cancer or some other major physical illness, most who live nearby check on them regularly and perhaps send cards or food. Unfortunately, mental illnesses are not “casserole illnesses.” When you or loved one received a diagnosis of mental illness, did your neighbors send you a card or bring you dinner? I have yet to hear of THAT happening! Why do we still experience such discrepant reactions from our friends?

Even at this point in history, many people are afraid or uncomfortable around those with mental health issues. Misunderstandings still exist, especially the idea that people with mental illness are violent. No matter what studies indicate social media and political leaders still jump to the conclusion that a shooting was due to someone’s mental illness. The newest research on violence has found that the majority of mass shootings or shootings in general are not related to mental illness. Those with serious mental illness are more likely to victims of violence rather than perpetrators. Is this just an expedient way to explain a shooting and avoid real issues or do we need to have a major campaign to share recent research? Most likely both and, sadly, the repercussions fall hardest on those who are coping with mental issues and symptoms.

Another reason for our lack of casseroles is because the general public lacks knowledge about mental illness in general. Most individuals have a general understanding about cancer treatment protocols, diabetes treatments, or common interventions for healing physical problems. But, how many realize that most mental illnesses are even treatable or what the treatment might entail? And even with the knowledge that Major Depression or Schizophrenia, for instance, is treatable, do they realize what a toll navigating the mental health system and find the best treatment takes on those in the process of recovery? It is not a path for the faint of heart. Having understanding and support from family, friends, and neighbors could be very helpful. While it seems unfair that we have to educate others, that is most likely what we need to do.

In addition, seeking out peer support from those who are on a similar journey can be another way to get the nurturing that we need. Many groups such as community mental health systems, outpatient hospital programs, and organizations like National Alliance on Mental Illness, offer opportunities for both individuals with symptoms and for family members and caregivers to get the kind of understanding, support, and resources that are needed to reduce isolation and feel hopeful about recovery.  Peer groups can be the backbone of your journey.

Despite my son’s recent family stressors, he did not experience a relapse. I credit his success in handling the past few weeks with the relapse plan that he and his healthcare providers created many years ago.

Research indicates that many individuals who are treated successfully with schizophrenia may still face a possible relapse. Of course, this can occur when someone stops taking medication without medical approval but this is not always the cause of a relapse. Sometimes, medication changes or even a medication that has been working may begin to fail even though it once was effective and may lead to a relapse. Engaging in substance abuse or alcohol abuse can trigger relapses. Other times, excessive stress can cause break through symptoms.

Jacob has had only one major relapse that forced him to take a break from his college classes for a semester and one brief relapse that resulted in a job performance issue. The first relapse appeared to be related to excessive stress during his senior year in college. At the time he was writing his thesis, living without roommates that year, and possibly worrying about life after graduation. Returning home and entering an outpatient program eventually helped him gain his independence and his ability to finish school. The second relapse was related to a medication change that just didn’t work for him. His increased agitation led to misunderstandings with his employer.

Since that time, he and his treatment team have identified signs that he can use as early warnings to indicate when he may be on the verge of a relapse. Early signs for him include increased agitation, paranoia, and/or sleeplessness. His first relapse also included the return of harmful auditory hallucinations. When he can identify these early signs, he can prevent a full relapse. Usually, at this point, all he has to do is call his psychiatrist who can add, increase, or reduce medications. Sometimes, just taking a break or sleeping will divert symptom breakthrough.

Because of this pre-planning and continued therapeutic support, he has been successfully recovered for over 20 years. The fact that he faced his present stressors – his wife’s major medical crises two weeks ago – is a testament to him and his treatment. Throughout the experience, he managed like any other spouse whose wife needed care. While I should have expected that to happen, old fears were certainly creeping into my brain. What an amazing relief to observe his resiliency. Who would have thought 23 years ago that we would be able to see these kinds of changes.

For those of you who are dealing with a new diagnosis or have not yet found the treatment that works, do not give up. Our story continues to be one of hope.

Building Resilence in the face of physical or mental illness is important important for those facing adversity and for their caretakers.